Maria Mena Album

It must have been hard; staying in line
knowing your influences did it all the time
It must have been strange; living in blue
and see me shut down as though
it was an easy thing to do
But you could tell where I had been
by the way I held my gun
Trying to write anything while being
mocked b an off beat drum
But I was not honest
I was not healthy
I was not honest, honest.

You did the right thing covered your scars
Challenged your faith
and closed your eyes driving cars
For all that they knew you were safe home
But you went through hell
whenever you were left alone

But you could see where I had been
in the pictures that they took
I tied to look positive at things,
Faced myself but didn't look
That was not honest
I was not healthy
I am not honest, honest.

I wish you could see yourself through my eyes
There's no need to cling to unnecessary lies
The voice in your head whose spirit you stole
left you for dead but you dug the hole

And I could see where you had been
from the marks around your wrists
The red water washed around your sins
but are you as pure as this?
No you are not honest
You are not healthy
You are not honest, honest.

I down this bottle of wine,
I don't know how to feel but
I don't mind the buzz
As the night moves slow you
look more and more like someone I could
love tonight
without the fuzz

And the feelings
I don't know you've been there
I don't think I can go there again

Don'T analyze me
There no apparent link between
the day he said he'd leave
and my

Reacurring dreams
and how I just can't sleep
unless I've had a drink or five

On these feelings
I don't know if you've been there
I don't think I can go there again
Oh these feelings
I don't know if you've been there
but I don't think I can go there again

I down this bottle of wine,
I don't know how to feel but
I don't mind the buzz.

I've run out complicated theories
so now I'm taking back my words
I'm preparing for the breakdown
Your t-shirt lost its smell of you
and the bathroom's still a mess
Remind me why we decided this was for the best...

Because I miss you love

I know the distance is a factor
but I stretch as often as I can
I hope to reach your hands any day now

Please don't blame me for trying,
to fix this one last time
I have a hard time as it is

Because I miss you love

Don't act like you don't know me
It's still me, I haven't changed
I'll be here when you come back

And I miss you love.

Tell me
am I your baby?
You misunderstand me,
just want a piece of your ass
Impress me
afterall I'm a lady
And dude if you bore me
i'll send you back to your wife

You're just a Boytoy Baby

Romance
I don't want no romance
Just grab me with your hands
and leave when I'm done

Honey
You can keep all your money
I want you to owe me
It's just a game that I play

You're just a boytoy baby
Boytoy baby

I understand
your need to switch the roles around
and despise me, for the fact that we didn't last
And I will be your punching bag
if you'll stay in my past
I understand
to want to have a mature dailogue
is to much to ask
And I will be your one regret
if you'll stay in my past

I've never been confronted with my own thouhts
They don't bother me when I'm alone
Can you come over save me, because he won't stop
Now get him off his fucking throne
Caution the floor's wet in here, been crying
I don't know why he seems convinced I'm lying
I don't know what he's capable of doing
but he's hurting me

It's not his fault I made him lose his temper
I should know better not to talk to loud
There's no one out there who could love me better
I'm not like you, you are too proud

Caution the floor's wet in here been crying
I don't know why he seems convinced I'm lying
I don't know what he's capable of doing
but he's hurting me

Don't leave me
Please believe me
Baby there is
I can explain
Please love me
Please need me.

I've never been confronted with m own thoughts
They don't bother me when I'm alone
Can you come over save me, because he won't stop
Now get him off his fucking throne.

Comfortable as I am
I need your reassurance
And comfortable as you are
You count the days

But if I wanted silence
I would whisper
And if I wanted loneliness
I'd choose to go
And if i liked rejection
I'd audition
And if I didn't love you
You would know

And why can't you just hold me
And how come it is so hard
And do you like to see me broken
And why do I still care
still care

You say you see the light now
At the end of this narrow hall
I wish it didn't matter
I wish I didn't give you all

But if I wanted silence
I would whisper
And if I wanted loneliness
I'd choose to go
And if i liked rejection
I'd audition
And if I didn't love you
You would know

And why can't you just hold me
And how come it is so hard
And do you like to see me broken
And why do I still care

Poor little misunderstood baby
No one likes a sad face
But I can't remember life without him
I think I did have good days
I think I did have good days

And Why ....
Why can't you just hold me
And how come it is so hard
And do you like to see me broken
And why do I still care

Your patronizing stare can watch me heal.
What I would give for you to tae the wheel
It's just been a long time coming
The strong resemblance to my mother's womb
is the reason why I will not leave this room
It's been a long time coming

The lack of self-esteem has grown on me
I'm not as strong as I appear to be
It's been a long time coming

My lullaby sounds more like distant screams
I wake up sleep deprived after every dream
It's been a long time coming

My flesh makes little sense compared to yours
I wish my restlessness would open doors
It's just been a long time coming

I understand
you delude yourself and sleep with a different girl
each night, in order to recover fast
And I will let you cheapen sex
if you'll stay in my past

I understand
that we can never speak again
and your resentment towards me will last
And I will let you forget me
if you'll stay in my past

What is the game we're playing?
should I stick around for more?
Snap your fingers I'll coming running
Leave again when you're bored
with me
I'll make it easy

Nevermind me, nevermind me
I'll just cast shadows on your walls
Nevermind me, nevermind me
My God I feel so small
Nevermind me, nevermind me
I'll just cast shadows on your walls
Nevermind me, nevermind me
I'll just let myself out.

This facade that I'm stuck with
has got me wondering
Just tell me how you want me
and I'll be naked stumbling
just to get a reaction, any signs of love

Nevermind me, nevermind me
I'll just cast shadows on your walls
Nevermind me, nevermind me
My God I feel so small
Nevermind me, nevermind me
I'll just cast shadows on your walls
Nevermind me, nevermind me
I'll just let myself out.

Bottle up your smile
Pour it in a cup
I'll be on my way
once I've sobered up

I said I said I said
I would cater to your ego and fold my hands in
prayer for your religion
if you would love me and walk me every day

You said, you said, you said.
You would not let your indecision get
in the way of my night but you still managed
to bring your bad temper
to my little show

I can not walk in these shoes
They hurt my toes
I can not stay in your grip
You hurt my nose
because you squeeze too hard let go of my head

They said, they said, they said
I should get a hobby like learn
how to play the accordion
to tell some of my records
but my fingers
can't keep up

I can not walk in these shoes
They hurt my toes
I can not stay in your grip
You hurt my nose
because you squeeze too hard let go of my head

Our battles are repetious
if not broken poetry
and maybe that's the attraction
that you're as self-absorbed as me

You jumped to the conclusion
and landed on my chest
Now how am I supposed to make you see.

I'll just write this down
with hopes that you'll understand
I can no longer be disciplined by
the frustration of an insecure man
And as I kiss your face you'll know that
I can no longer apologize for
your former lover's mistakes.

My past is mine to keep
Who are you to question me...?
Perhaps someday you'll learn
Too bad
it's not our turn


You jumped to the conclusion
and landed on my chest
Now how am I supposed to make you see.

I'll just write this down
with hopes that you'll understand
I can no longer be disciplined by
the frustration of an insecure man
And as I kiss your face you'll know that
I can no longer apologize for
your former lover's mistakes.

I walk barefoot where the water drowns the sand
with you no longer here to hold my hand

I let go
I let go

The ocean makes my swelling heart feel small
With the sounds it makes you won't hear it if I call
I let go
I let go

There's a breeze in the air
There's a boat anrchored out here
There's a calm under the waves so I choose to sink

Your skin protected me from sunbeams
Your hands made sure I'd stay intact
I let go
I let go

You were always there to walk me home
With you not here, the streets I roam
I let go
I let go

There's a breeze in the air
There's a boat anrchored out here
There's a calm under the waves as I choose to sink
With your voice in my head
I would float here instead
But there's a calm under the waves
So I choose to sink

I'm tired now
I'll see you when I wake up
I've heard it's pretty where you are
I let go
I let go
There's a breeze.

I understand
That we can never speak again
And your resentment towards me will last
and I will let you forget me
if you'll stay in my past

I understand
That you will one day love again
And that it's selfish of me to want to ask
if you can only live off the memory of me

So please stay in my past.