The Vandals Album

(News clip)

(News clip)

Anarchy
Kill a cat
Shoot James Brady in the back
Raise an army of rabid rats
Beat your neighbor with a bat

Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Anarchy burger
Hold the government

Anarchy
Go ape shit
Let them know you're sick of it
Write your congressman
Tell him he sucks
Only in it for the bucks

Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Anarchy burger
Hold the government

You're all potential anarchy burgers
If you wanna be free
Order yourself an anarchy burger
Hold the government please

Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Anarchy burger
Hold the government

They say America stands for freedom
But if you think you're free
Try walkin into a deli
And urinating on the cheese

Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Hold the government please
Hold the government

Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Anarchy burger
Hold the government

Say fuck in front of your mom
FUCK!
And go to school naked

Anarchy burger
Hold the government
Anarchy burger
Hold the government

Pat Brown - Tried to run the cops down - Pat Brown - Ran 'em into the ground - Pat Brown - Tried to run the cops down - Pat Brown - Ran 'em into the ground - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the cops down - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the mother f**kin cops into the ground - Pat Brown - Gets real mean, when he's in his machine - He's no zero, he's a f**king hero - Pat Brown - He didn't get too far - Pat Brown - He got holes in his car - Pat Brown - They threw him in jail - Pat Brown - Couldn't pay his bail - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the cops down - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the mother f**kin cops into the ground - Pat Brown - He's a crazy guy - and I'll tell you why - He's no clown, so don't f**k around - He's got a shotgun, yeah he thinks it's fun - To shoot at you - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the cops down - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the mother f**kin cops into the ground - Pat Brown - He's a crazy guy - Yeah I'll tell you why - On a hunting trip - the trigger slipped - someone almost died - Circle Massage got a shotgun barrage - He won't pay 50 bucks for head - Music shop got a midnight shopping stop - "Hello Marshal Amps" - Stereo store got hit for even more - But Pat got caught - At the Cuckoo's Nest, he did his best - To waste some pigs - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the cops down - Patrick Edward Brown - Tried to run the mother f**kin cops into the ground - Pat Brown - He don't f**k around - Pat Brown - He's got a shotgun - Yeah you better run - Me and Joey know - Here he comes - down your street - Sawed-off shotgun - in his seat - Better look around - cause here comes Pat Brown - Gonna run you down - Now don't f**k around - with Pat Brown - Don't f**k around - with Pat Brown - with Pat - Bra-rown

it's the gay nineties and
you can't watch nothin' good
mindless pinko garbage
is all they make in hollywood
kung fu theatre,
now there's a show with class
I'd like to find the guy
who cancelled it
and karate chop his ass
so after alf is done
there ain't nuthin' good on
all my rowdy friends come over
'cause i have pong


join us! join us! join us!
join us for pong!

i got the foxes i got that clout
i got my unit on
the day they came out
you bring the snack treats,
you bring the booze
i ain't bringin' nuthin',
does that box belong to you?
pass the dutchie's on,
my all time favorite song
but turn it down you moron
'cause we're tryin'
to play pong

don't be fooled by world peace
or an economy that's stable
the c.i.a.'s just got more time
to watch you
through your cable
they would control you
and take away your brain
you can defeat them
if you switch your box
over to "game"
do what's right to you,
not what they tell you to
you can fight
we meet tonight
so join us for pong

it's up to you to improve
your hand eye-coordination
or become a mindless servant,
unwitting puppet of the nation
they know your address,
they send you bills
they decide if you watch Tyson,
don't that give you the chills
shake off your shackles son,
we've only just begun
there's just two speeds,
it's what you need,
so join us for pong

[No lyrics]

[No lyrics]

You can tell I'm no great planner - I ended up at the wanna be manor - wanna be manor, what a place to be - wanna be manor, it's not for me - I looked in the door, opened the door - peeed on the floor, spotted a whore - drugs and filth are all around - no clean dishes can be found - if you thought that your nightmares were scary - wait till you meet the hoe called jerri - no one dragged a dead fish in the room - it's spreading legs and her female perfume - I walked upstairs, I can't explain - but I got involved in a three man train - was it fun? Yeah, I guess - but I got crabs like all the rest - Dave's a cool guy but he's a really a slob - lives on unemployment, and he can't get a job - go ahead and take a drink, there's nothing to fear - just make sure you sniff that beer! - Passing out is no excuse - you'll be subject to abuse - some will let you hang there - It's just the pigs on their nightly visit - After busting one person each - the pigs said to move out of huntington beach - now I'll have to find a new town - or find another wanna be manor - wanna be manor - You can tell I'm no great planner - I ended up at the wanna be manor - wanna be manor, what a place to be - wanna be manor, it's not for me - wanna be manor - wanna be manor

Now Mohawk John knew he did wrong - when he went and killed some men - They sent for the marshal to bring him in - they sent for Marshal Skin - He rolled into town, - and pulled his cowboy hat down - Cause everyone knows a skinhead, - and skinheads aren't allowed - (skinheads aren't allowed) - in Mohawk Town - The sun was high and his mouth was dry - So he rolled up to the saloon - He ordered himself some red eye - he knew he'd meet John soon - Checked out all the Mohawks - sittin round the bar - He knew he found the Mohawk town - and John couldn't be too far - He rolled into town, - and pulled his cowboy hat down - Cause everyone knows a skinhead, - and skinheads aren't allowed - (skinheads aren't allowed) - in Mohawk Town - He walked out of the saloon - and there stood Mohawk John - He didn't have no time to speak - both guns had just been drawn - Now Mohawk John was quick - but Skin shot straight and fast - He put a slug right through his heart - and laid him on his back - He rolled into town, - and pulled his cowboy hat down - Cause everyone knows a skinhead, - and skinheads aren't allowed - (skinheads aren't allowed) - in Mohawk Town

Mr. Playboy, Sir Weasel, Poppin Snake, and Mr. Cool
Went down to the boulevard to play their ass some pool

Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla
Lady Killer
Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla
Lady Killer
I'mfa for, I'mfa for, I'mfa dancin' wit you
Here go one, here go one, here go one, woooo

Mr. Flashdance, Old Bufu, Man Sam, and Doctor Boots
Came down from the south town to snort theey ass some toots

Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla
Lady Killer
Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla
Lady Killer
I'mfa for, I'mfa for, I'mfa dancin' wit you
Here go one, here go one, here go one, woooo

Well they came down looking to score
But they got a whole lot more
When they started a fight on that frightful night
At Lady Killer's bar

Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla
Lady Killer
Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla, Illa Zilla
Lady Killer
I'mfa for, I'mfa for, I'mfa dancin' wit you
Here go one, here go one, here go one, woooo

So if you have to leave your turf
You better not go far
Or start a fight on friday night
In Lady Killer's Bar

judy hates me,
stepped on her cat
i hate judy,
she's gettin' too fat
sally left me,
i was gettin' kinda cold
i left sally,
she was gettin' kinda old

oooh, oooh, what's a guy to say?

tawana don't like
the tapes i bought
boo-yah tribe,
new kids on the block
tracy says my car is dumb
i think there's more
where she came from

oooh, oooh,
what's a guy to say?
girls are turning 18 every day

rachel turned 18 just last week
kamie turned 18, looks so sweet
jenny's lookin' sorry at 29
but her sister turned 18
just in time

hey homes, don't front my set
hey homes, don't front my set

word! you fudge with me
you fudge with the crew
word! the dumbest thing you'll
ever do
word! don't front my set
'cuz we got power
word! i got guys
comin' in from bellflower

hey homes, don't front my set

word! me and my home boys just
don't dig
word! you bustin' turf
and strartin' sheet
word! crazy, crazy
close you stay
word! what the hell
did i just say?

hey homes, don't front my set

word! this ain't no
downtown box of wine
word! homey bus head,
he did no time
word! jacked his ride,
cold set up heads
word! just stop me
if i'm makin' sense
hey homes, don't front my set

Ever Since my baby left me
I found a new place to dwell
It's down on the end of a lonely street
called Heart Break Hotel

She left me in the gutter
with mud on my face
She left me in the gutter
a total disgrace

She took my manhood
and broke it in two
Now what's a broken
hearted man supposed to do?

Ever Since my baby left me
I found a new place to dwell
It's down on the end of a lonely street
called Heart Break Hotel

been so lonely, so f**kin lonely
So god damn lonely I could shit
I been so lonely, so f**kin lonely
So god damn lonely I wanna kill that bitch

cause
She was a cunt, she was a bitch
She left me with a crotch that itched
She was a cunt, she was a bitch
She left me with a crotch that itched

So I grab some pliers
pulled off her clit
Sit on her face and
make her eat my shit
Tie her up
beat her with bats
Stick her in the cellar
feed her to the rats
Poke her in the eye
f**k her in the socket
Get a dull butter knife and
cut her tit a pocket
Put a gun upto her head
make sure that f**ked bitch is dead

She was a cunt, she was a bitch
She left me with a crotch that itched
She was a cunt, she was a bitch
She left me with a crotch that itched

Been so lonely, so f**kin lonely
So god damn lonely I could shit
I been so lonely, so f**kin lonely
So god damn lonely I wanna kill that bitch

Seven hits of L
And nobody could tell
So I spent every dime
Just to get to Anaheim
I was in the Magic Kingdom
Now I'm in the Carribean
You get something really wicked
When you spend an E-ticket

High adventure on the sea
But it's not the life for me
Now those hairy tatooed pirates are all chasing after me
I was threatened with a knife by a pirate playing fife
Now I'm sailing for my life thanks to LSD 25

Where can I hide?
I don't want to buy a bride
I'm alone as I float
Hey, there were others in my boat
Up ahead, one of the men
He said he would be my friend
He'd guide me to the hole
If I deeded him my soul
To the hole I didn't make it
That doesn't mean he didn't take it
He laughed at my plight
He said you'll be one of us tonight

High adventure on the sea
But it's not the life for me
Now those hairy tatooed pirates are all chasing after me
I was threatened with a knife by a pirate playing fife
Now I'm sailing for my life thanks to LSD 25

He was right
I'm still here
As I have been
For over a year
With my last bit of hope
A tin can and rope
I just want to break free
But I can't get away
No I can't get away
Cause that damn dog's got the key
No one listens as I tell
Of my ordeal in this cell
They stand right by
But they don't fell
Is this for real?
Is this for real!

summer lovin' had me a blast
summer lovin' happened so fast
met some girl, crazy for me
met a guy, cute as can be
summer days drifted away
to oh, the summer nights

tell me more,
was this texas or france?
tell me more,
did you get in her pants?

went to her place,
got in her blouse
while the roadies
demolished her house
watched her cable, stole her tv
she did my band
just the way she did me
summer hoes open their does
then get grounded
for the rest of their life

tell me more,
did her parents come home?
tell me more,
did you call nome on her phone?

in gay paris the girls are so chic
they don't talk english
so they last a whole week
german foxes,
way too much hair
put that wall back
so that they stay there
here's my adress
come stay with me
too bad you can't afford
to come overseas

tell me more,
did you make true love vows?
tell me more,
what if she finds your house?

i got sober that's where it ends
so i told her
we'd still be friends
she was cool,
but just like the rest
i had to leave her
with a phony address
"of course i live there,
i love you, you fox"
(your welcome anytime
at my p.o. box)

san francisco, our closing night
thought he'd finally
met mrs. right
bought her flowers,
read her my poem
said he'd call me
the next day at home
didn't answer
she's with some other dude
probably begging
out on Haight street for food

I want to be a Cowboy - I got to be a Cowboy - I'm born to be a Cowboy - I want to be a Cowboy - A Cowboy! Uh-huh - Tonight we're taking me fast car - Were gonna go down to the Cowboy bar - I'm gonna wait till the club is full - and I'm gonna ride the mechanical bull - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true Cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late - All the Cowgirls in their Stetson hats - and their tight fitting jeans so they don't look fat - We'll all be listening to the Cowboy tunes - and stomp around like a bunch of goons - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late - We're all OD'd on the Olden West - seein' who's Cowboy clothes look the best - I can ride that phony bull so damn good - Sometimes I think I'm Clint Eastwood - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late - I know I'm a Cowboy deep inside - My hat band's made out of synthetic rattle snake hide - After a couple shit kickin' Cowboy movies - I'll check out the Cowboy scene down at Zubie's - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late - Find out who all fights the best - We start fights with them punks at the Cuckoo's Nest - Those damn punks are crazy(though) - and meaner than a bull at a rodeo - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late - You call me an Urban clone of course - A big deal if I'm afraid to ride a horse - With a broken nose and a f**ked up knee - Maybe this Cowboy scene just ain't for me - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late - Yee Haw - Cowboy look is the one I sought - Can't change now cause the clothes are bought - To be a true cowboy was my fate - I can't help it if I was born late

(Chorus:)
Some people call me a teenage idol,
say they envy me;
they got no way of knowin',
how lonesome I can be.

I need somebody to be my baby,
to tell my troubles to;
got no time to find her,
cause I'm just passin' through.

(Bridge:)
I travel around from town to lonesome town,
guess all I'll be is a rollin' stone;
fortune and fame, everybody knows my name,
that won't mean a thing if I'm all alone, woah!

(Chorus)
(Bridge)
(Chorus)

I get no rest when I'm feelin' weary,
pack my bags and go;
I gotta go tomorrow,
and go and do my show.

I wanna share myself, oh,
just spread myself around with someone, anybody,
one of God's creatures-cause I'm so lonesome.

He met her at the soundcheck, where she was tendin' bar - Bodacious ones and ruby lips, a regular movie star - Her singin' voice was pleasin', that's how she got her name - He wasn't from her neighborhood, but he loved her just the same - How he wished he could move to Hollywood - How he wished he could move to Hollywood - But there's goop all over the phone, and Pleasant all over that bill - He'd like to see a lot more of her, cause she gives him such a thrill - But he's from down in Long Beach, and she lives in Hollywood Hills - So there's goop all over the phone, and Pleasant all over the bill - Like a duck after a June bug, he's on that honey bee - And every night he phones her hive and they get real sticky - He tells her that he loves her, but can only talk awhile - Cause the phone gets like a greased up hog and the bill's a country mile - (CHORUS) - Now he went off atourin', cause the Vandals gotta play - But with every show their love cost more cause he gets further away - There's only one solution, a phoney calling card - But he yapped & yapped till he got slapped with a serious federal charge - (CHORUS) - Now the judge denied him bail, and he fought back the tears - And he thought of Pleasant's beauty as they gave him 20 years - He said, "I'll go real peaceful like, I know I broke the law, - But I ain't stoop so gimme the goop - Cause I still got one phone call." - And there's goop all over the phone.