The Dresden Dolls Album

So you don't want to hear about my good song
You don't want to hear about how I am getting on
With all the things that I can get done
The sun is in the sky and I am by my lonesome
So you don't want to hear about my good day
You have better things to do than to hear me say

God it's been a lovely day
Everything's going my way
I took out the trash today
And I'm on fire...

So you don't want to hear about my good friends
You don't have the guts to take the truth or consequence
Success is in the eye of the beholder
And it's looking even better over your cold shoulder

I'm not suggesting
You get and line me up for questioning
But Jesus think
About the bridges you are burning and I'm betting
That even though you knew it from the start
You'd rather be a bitch than be an ordinary broken heart

So go ahead and talk about your bad day
I want all the details of the pain and misery
That you are inflicting on the others
I consider them my sisters and I want their numbers

God it's been a lovely day
Everything's going my way
I took up croquet today
And I'm on fire

I picked up the pieces of my broken ego
I have finally made my peace as far as you and me go
But I'd love to have you up to see the place
I'd like to do more than survive
I'd like to rub it in your face, ha !

Hey it's been a lovely day
Everything's going my way
I had so much fun today
And I'm on fire

God it's been a lovely day
Everything's going my way
Ever since you went away
And I'm on fire

I'm on fire
I'm on fire
I'm on

I'm on fire
I'm on fire
I'm on fire
I'm on

So you don't want to hear about my good day

One, two, three, four!

You can tell
From the scars on my arms
And cracks in my hips
And the dents in my car
And the blisters on my lips
That I'm not the carefullest of girls

You can tell
From the glass on the floor
And the strings that're breaking
And I keep on breaking more
And it looks like I am shaking
But it's just the temperature
And then again
If it were any colder I could disengage
If I were any older I could act my age
But I don't think that you'd believe me

It's not the way I'm meant to be
It's just the way the operation made me

And you can tell
From the state of my room
That they let me out too soon
And the pills that I ate
Came a couple years too late
And I've got some issues to work through
There I go again
Pretending to be you
Make-believing
That I have a soul beneath the surface
Trying to convince you
It was accidentally on purpose

I am not so serious
This passion is a plagiarism
I might join your century
But only on a rare occasion
I was taken out
Before the labor pains set in and now
Behold the world's worst accident
I am the girl anachronism

And you can tell
By the red in my eyes
And the bruises on my thighs
And the knots in my hair
And the bathtub full of flies
That I'm not right now at all
There I go again
Pretending that I'll fall
Don't call the doctors
They've seen it all before
They'll say just
Let her crash and burn
She'll learn
The attention just encourages her

And you can tell
From the full-body cast
That you're sorry that you asked
Though you did everything you could
Like any decent person would
But I might be catching so don't touch
You'll start believeing youre immune to gravity and stuff
Don't get me wet
Because the bandages will all come off

And you can tell
From the smoke at the stake
That the current state is critical
Well it is the little things, for instance
In the time it takes to break it she can make up ten excuses
Please excuse her for the day
Its just the way the medication makes her

I don't necessarily believe there is a cure for this
So I might join your century but only as a doubtful guest
I was too precarious removed as a caesarian
Behold the worlds worst accident
I am the girl anachronism
Behold the worlds worst accident
I am the girl anachronism
Behold the worlds worst accident
I am the girl anachronism
I am the girl anachronism

Missed me
Missed me
Now you've got to kiss me
If you kiss me, mister
I might tell my sister
If I tell her, mister
She might tell my mother
And my mother, mister
She might tell my father
And my father, mister
He won't be too happy
And he'll have his lawyer
Come up from the city
And arrest you, mister
So I wouldn't miss me
If you get me, mister, see ?

Missed me
Missed me
Now you've got to kiss me
If you kiss me, mister
You must think I'm pretty
If you think so, mister
You must want to fuck me
If you fuck me, mister
It must mean you love me
If you love me, mister
You would never leave me
It's as simple as can be !

Missed me
Missed me
Now you've got to kiss me
If you miss me, mister
Why do you keep leaving
If you trick me, mister
I will make you suffer
And they'll get you, mister
Put you in the slammer
And forget you, mister
Then you'll miss me
Won't you, won't you miss me
Won't you miss me
Won't you miss me

Missed me
Missed me
Now you've got to kiss me
If you kiss me, mister
Take responsibility
I'm fragile, mister
Just like any girl would be
And so misunderstood
So treat me delicately!

Missed me
Missed me
Now you've gone and done it
Hope you're happy
In the county penitentiary
It serves you right
For kissing little girls
But I'll visit
If you miss me
Say you miss me
'Cause the food they feed you
Do you miss me
Will you kiss me through the window
Do you miss me
Miss me
Will they ever let you go
I miss my mister so

Half underwater
I'm half my mother's daughter
A fraction's left up to dispute

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

The whole collection
Half off the price they're asking
In the halfway house, I will repute

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.
Ah-ah, uh-oh (X3)
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah.

Half accidental
Half pain full instrumental
I have a lot to think about

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.
You think they're joking
You have to go provoke him
I guess it's high time you found out

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

It's half biology
And half corrective surgery gone wrong
You'll notice something funny
If you hang around here for too
Long ago in some black hole
Before they had these pills to take it back
I'm half Jill
And half Jack !

Uh-oh, Oh Oh! (x3)
Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

Uh-oh , Oh Oh! (x3)
Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

Two halves are equal
A cross between two evils
It's not an enviable lot

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.
But if you listen
You'll learn to hear the difference
Between the halfs and the half nots

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

And when I let him in
I feel the stitches getting sicker
I try to wash him out
But like they say
The blood is thicker
I see my mother in my face
But only when I travel
I run as fast as I can run
But Jack comes tumbling after

And when I'm brave enough
And find a clever way to kick him out
And I'm so high not even you
And all your love could bring me down
On 83rd he never found
The magic words to change this fact
I'm half Jill
And half jack

Uh-oh , Oh Oh! (x3)
Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

Uh-oh , Oh Oh! (x3)
Ah-ah, ah-ah, ah-ah.

I'm halfway home now
Half hoping for a showdown
'Cause I'm not big enough to house this crowd

Uh-oh, uh-oh, uh-oh.

It might destroy me
But I'd sacrifice my body
If it meant I'd get the Jack part out

See (see) jack run (run)
Jack run (run) jack
See (see) jack see (see)
Jack (Jack) run (run) Jack
Run (run) Jack see (run)
Jack (jack) see (see) Jack (Jack)
Run (run) Jack (Jack) run (run)
Jack (Jack) see (see) Jack (Jack)
See (See) Jack (Jack) run (run)
Jack (Jack) run (run) Jack (Jack)

Run Jack run

Six hundred seventy two
Six hundred seventy two
Six hundred seventy two
Six hundred seventy two

Oh
Someday I will find out about you too

Coin operated boy
Sitting on the shelf he is just a toy
But I turn him on and he comes to life
Automatic joy
That is why I want
A coin operated boy

Made of plastic and elastic
He is rugged and long-lasting
Who could ever ever ask for more
Love without complications galore

Many shapes and weights to choose from
I will never leave my bedroom
I will never cry at night again
Wrap my arms around him and pretend

Coin operated boy
All the other real ones that I destroy
Cannot hold a candle to my new boy
And I'll never let him go
And I'll never be alone
And I'll never let him go
And I'll never be alone, go
And I'll never be alone, go
And I'll never be alone, go
And I'll never be alone, go
And I'll never be alone
Not with my coin operated boy

This bridge was written to make you feel smittener
With my sad picture of girl getting bitterer
Will you extract me from my plastic fantasy
I didn't think so but I'm still convinceable
Will you persist even after I bet you
A billion dollars that I'll never love you
And will you persist even after I kiss you
Goodbye for the last time
Will you keep on trying
To prove it
I'm dying
To lose it
I'm losing
My confidence
I want him
I want him
I want him
I want him
I want you
I want you
I want you
I want you
I want you
I want you
I want you
I want you
I want a
I want a
I want a
I
Want
A
Coin operated boy

And if I had a star to wish on
For my life I can't imagine
Any flesh and blood could be his match
I can even take him in the bath

Coin operated boy
He may not be real
Experienced with girls
But I know he feels
Like a boy should feel
Isn't that the point
That is why I want a
Coin operated boy
With his pretty coin operated voice
Saying that he loves me
That he's thinking of me
Straight and to the point
That is why I want
A coin operated boy

Gravity plays favorites I know it cause I saw
Honest to God, Officer, it's awful
Down at work I'm getting too familiar with the floor
Trading in my talents by the mouthful

Hate to break it to you but it's out of my control
Forces go to work while we are sleeping, sleeping
If I could attack with a more sensible approach
Obviously that's what I'd be doing
Right

Now
Necks are cracking sideways
Hit me from the back side
I am on the white side
You are on the black side
Cut a piece that's bite size
Shoot me from my good side
If you got a straight line
This would be a good time

Gravity works slowly if you notice it at all
Some of us are getting mighty lucky
Aren't we
If you had to live with this you'd rather lie than fall
You think I can't fly
Well you just watch me, watch me

...

Necks are cracking sideways
Hit me from the back side
I am on the thin side
You are on the fat side
Cut a piece thats bite size
Shoot me from my bad side
If you got a straight line
This would be a good time

The sky is always falling down on me
The sky is always falling, falling, oh
The sky is always falling down on me
So Officer
Forgive me please!

Biting keeps your words at bay
Tending to the sores that stay
Happiness is just a gash away
When I open a familiar scar
Pain goes shooting like a star
Comfort hasn't failed to follow so far

And you might say it's self-indulgent
You might say its self-destructive
But, you see, it's more productive
Than if I were to be healthy

And pens and penknives take the blame
Crane my neck and scratch my name
But the ugly marks
Are worth the momentary gain
When I jab a sharpened object in
Choirs of angels seem to sing
Hymns of hate in memorandum

And you might say it's self-indulgent
And you might say it's self-destructive
But, you see, it's more productive
Than if I were to be happy

And sappy songs about sex and cheating
Bland accounts of two lovers meeting
Make me want to give mankind a beating

And you might say it's self-destructive
But, you see, I'd kick the bucket
Sixty times before I'd kick the habit

And as the skin rips off
I cherish the revolting thought
That even if I quit
There's not a chance in hell I'd stop
And anyone can see the signs
Mittens in the summertime
Thank you for your pity
You are too kind

And you might say it's self-inflicted
But you see that's contradictive
Why on earth would anyone practice self destruction

And pain opinions are sitcom feeding
They don't know that their minds are teething
Makes me want to give mankind a beating

I've tried bandages and sinking
I've tried gloves and even thinking
I've tried vaseline
I've tried everything
And no-one cares if your back is bleeding
They're too concerned with their hair receding
Looking back it was all maltreating
Every thought that occurred misleading

Makes me want to give myself a beating

I could make a dress
A robe fit for a prince
I could clothe a continent
But I can't sew a stitch

I can paint my face
And stand very very still
It's not very practical
But it still pays the bills

I can't change my name
But I could be your type
I can dance and win at games
Like backgammon and life

I used to be the smart one
Sharp as a tack
Funny how that skipping years ahead
Has held me back

I used to be the bright one
Top in my class
Funny what they give you when you
Just learn how to ask

I can write a song
But I can't sing in key
I can play piano
But I never learned to read

I can't trap a mouse
But I can pet a cat
No I'm really serious
I'm really very good at that

I can't fix a car
But I can fix a flat
I could fix a lot of things
But I'd rather not get into that

I used to be the bright one
Smart as a whip
Funny how you slip so far
When teachers don't keep track of it

I used to be the tight one
The perfect fit
Funny how those compliments can
Make you feel so full of it

I can shuffle, cut and deal
But I can't draw a hand
I can't draw a lot of things
I hope you understand
I'm not exceptionally shy
But I've never had a man
That I could look straight in the eye
And tell my secret plans

I can take a vow
And I can wear a ring
And I can make you promises
But they won't mean a thing

Can't you do it for me
I'll pay you well
Fuck I'll pay you anything
If you could end this

Can't you just fix it for me
It's gone berserk
Oh fuck, I'll give you anything
If you can make the damn thing work

Can't you just fix it for me
I'll pay you well
Oh fuck, I'll pay you anything
If you can end this

Hello, I love you
Will you tell me your name
Hello, I'm good for nothing
Will you love me just the same
The same

I've been driving around town
With my head spinning around
Everywhere I look I see
Your '96 Jeep Cherokee

You're a bully and a clown
You made me cry and put me down
After all that I've been through
You'd think I'd hate the sight of you

But with every jeep I see
My broken heart still skips a beat
I guess it's just my stupid luck
That all of Boston drives
The same black fucking truck

It could be him
Or am I tripping
And I'm crashing
Into everything
And thinking about
Skipping town awhile
Until these cars go out of style

I try to see it in reverse
It makes the situation hundreds of times worse
When I wonder if it makes you want to cry
Every time you see a light blue Volvo driving by

So don't tell me if you're off to see the world
I know you won't get very far
But don't tell me if you get another girl
Baby, just tell me if you get another car

The number of them is insane
Every exit's an ex-boyfriend memory lane
Every major street's a minor heart attack
I see a red jeep and I want to paint it black

It could be him
Or am I tripping
And I'm crashing
Into everything
I can't wait 'til you trade the damn thing in
By then they will have put me in the loony bin

It could be him
My heart is pounding
It's just no use
I'm surrounded
But one day I'll steal your car and switch the gears
And drive that Cherokee right off the trail of tears

A late april day and it's sunny outside
And a red little girl's at the top of a slide
And an an orange old man at the bottom
Wants to take her for a ride

As she slips and she tumbles the orange man mumbles
Pennies crash down from the sky
And he tells her he'll take her away where it's safe
And of course it is a lie

She's a third the way down and her skirts are yanked up
And her little girl cheeks start to wrinkle
But her smile is wide and her legs are spread wider
Her hair growing long
And her hips
Getting larger
Past
Getting brighter
Light
Growing weaker

She is halfway down now but the man is impatient
Shakes change in his pocket he might have to wait
But she's coming
She's coming
She's coming

Who are you blaming
They're just playing
That's a good one
Who left the playground
A good decade
Before the bell rang

As she starts to draw nearer his view becomes clearer
The splinters are painful but she doesn't feel it
The pennies were loaded and as they exploded
She starts to spin out of control

Her eyes are now closing
Her sleeves are unrolling
Up past her head
And her veins are all showing
Not that she noticed
She's thoroughly focused on
One old man who's laughing
Who's laughing
Who's laughing

Don't worry, I've got you
Don't worry, I've got you
Don't worry, I've got you
Don't worry, I've got you
The orangeman got you

A late april day and it's sunny outside
And a red little girl's at the top of a slide
And an orange old man at the bottom
Wants to take her for a ride

You can have Washington
I'll take New Jersey
You can have London
But I want New York City

I should get providence
I've got a job now
Los Angeles, obvious
That's where you belong now

You can have Africa
Asia, Australia
As long as you keep your hands off
Cafe Pamplona

We can split Germany
Right down the middle
You'd hate it there anyway
Take Berlin
And we'll call it even

You can have all of the carry-on baggage
I'll trade the saskia jokes for the alphabet language

And special occasions were split between parents
Who forced us to hate them on alternating weekends

You call it over and I call you psycho
Significant other
Just say we were lovers and we'll call it even
We'll call it even
We'll call it even

I am the ground zero ex-friend you ordered
Disguised as a hero to get past your borders
I know when I'm wanted
I'll leave if you ask me to
Mind my own business
And speak when I'm spoken to

I am the tower around which you orbited
I am not proud I am just taking orders
I fall to the ground within powers of impact
I hit back when hit
And attack when attacked

You get route two between Concord and Lexington
I want Mass Ave. from the square to my apartment

And if we should meet through some misunderstanding
I'll be very sweet very patient and forgiving
Now get off my side of the state

And if we should see one another in passing
Despite these techniques
There is sometimes no avoiding
There must be some kind of mistake

We'll raise high the white flags
And bow heads and shake hands
Declaring the land we're on unamerican
We'll call it even
We'll call it even

I am the tower around which you orbited
I am not proud I am just taking orders
I fall to the groud within moments of impact
I hit back when hit
And attack when attacked

I am an accident waiting to happen
I'm laughing like mad if you strangle the captain
My place may be taken, but make no mistake
From a little black box
I can say without shame
That you've lost
That you've lost
Do you know what you've lost

So take whatever you'd like
I'll strike like the States on fire
You won't sleep very tight
No hiding, no safe cover
Make your bed now lie
Just like you always do
You can fake it for the papers
But I'm on to you
I'm on to you

So take whatever you'd like
I'll strike like the States on fire
You won't sleep very tight
No hiding, no safe covers
Make your bed and now lie
Just like you always do
You can fake it for the papers
But I'm on to you
I'm on to you
I'm on to you
I'm on to you