Danger Doom Album

(feat. Danger Mouse and MF Doom)

[Brak]
Why did you buy this album?
I don't know why you did, you're stupid

"{Fuck} yourself"

[MF Doom]
Ha ha ha ha!
The super flow with more jokes than Bazooka Joe
A mix between Superfly Snuka and a superhoe
Chew a MC like El Chupa Nibre
Digest a group and sell the poop on eBay
Danger with the vest screamin "Shoot the DJ!"
Doom clickin over two chickens, three-way
Four in the 5, a cork on the freeway
Villain find a way to make 'em pay whatever we say
... state your intentions
"I really love your tape but I hate your inventions"
Very well - what you want, a brownie?
He took off the mask and whispered "Put me where you found me"
He kept his paper digits in a chunk
Once joined a rap click - midgets into crunk
He did a solo on the oboe
Coulda sold a million then the Villain went for dolo
... and cited creative differences
Basically they hated, he left no jaded witnesses
Rappers suck, when they spit I doubt 'em
The crap they sing about you'll wanna slap the {fuckin shit} out 'em
Psht - time waits for no man
On a blind date, a love with a slow chrome hand
Judged him by his shoes, hot smelly Brogan
Budged him with the news, called him pot-bellied Conan
... no prick barbarian
A strict bear-atarian, a sick pair of merry men
The beat is like a swift kick in the rear end
The stiff {dick} made her lose her lipstick and hairpin
He said "Djamn! Act like you know me
Even with the mask on, show me what you owe me"
Tell her brush her grill and wash her face and {twat} homey
Dumile got her like Inuyasha got Kagome
What we have here is a failure to communicate
If you gonna hate, might at least get your rumors straight
about Doom the Great, a lot more confident
Came a long way since the days we had to rhyme for rent
It was time well spent, vented
Spelt and dented, hell-bented and heaven-scented
A wire is dead, he's in it for the cash flow
I'd like to send a big up to Firehead Lazzo
Let a brother know once you lasso Hasbro
So when he come with Destro he gets no hassle
... could hardly get a word in and
wonderin what the damage is to retain Harvey Birdman?

(*BEEP!!*}

[Master Shake]
Yo uhh, Danger! It's me your old buddy Shake
Ahh, I heard you're doin a little project and uhh, y'know
I hear you talked to some OTHER PEOPLE
and I thought you were smarter than that
But obviously I am WRONG cause you know my rappin is the {shit}
I don't give it out for free though! So uhh, I'll do it
Feel free to call me, at my number, which you have

{*phone hangs up*}

Scared of a bunch of water, then get out the rain
Order a rapper for lunch and spit out the chain
Then kick a lungee of the tip of his timbo
And trick a honey dip into a game of of strip limbo
Odd... He couldn't find no remorse
A wink is as good as a nod to a blind horse
Of course his technique was from a divine source
Never new the price of ice or what swine cost
One guy tried to bite the heat
That's when he discovered the other other white meat
Ohhhh, the one they hate so well
He sure keeps it pyscho like the old bates motel
They came to ask him for a least some new tracks
But only got confronted by the beast with two backs
Knock... Mouse is a made man
Villain laid it down like the best laid plan
[?] the cat who the hell is that near the middle
Got y'all but it's not all bare and skittles
Prepare the viddles, got riddles and spittles
Crystal clear to the jock or the tittle
TSSSS.. It's hot off the griddle
Came to take the cake wether it's a lot or a little
KABOOM... DOOM is nervous large
You could tell by his Blooming room service charge
Dark and tall to boot
The only thing was wrong was he was bald as a coot
Used to rent a van from Peter Pan to red and tan
And keep the human foot for his dead man's hand
This was when the mask was brand spanking new
Before it got rusted from drinking all the brew
[Sniff] Stankin' too, pew
Kept all his earnings in the bank and his shoe
Spat what he knew, energy for true
To all fake rappers, twenty-three skidoo
Excuse you, any room in the class front?
For a blast of the blunt, shrooming since last month
Doom a human in the mask I'm on the stunt
Danger zooming past mad fast on the hunt
Keep the streets, we got the city needing conquered
Discreetly with the city till they be completely bonkered
The fans demanded it, handled it, swallow it
His own brandishing, if only he could bottle it
Hmm.. Nah she could get messy
Feds tried to tortue him for the secret recipe
He said: It's no use, I only know half
No speake de english. I only do the math
Zzzzz. Felt no pain
His brain was saturated with cocaine and Rogaine
He said: Try scan no thing three-card dead fly man
go for bling he got bled
I jam over sting, see spots red
I am "Sofa King, We Todd Ed"

(feat. Ghostface Killah)


[Intro: song sample]
"Is it much, too much to ask
Not to hide behind the mask"

[MF Doom]
Head on straight, mask on crooked
Exit stage left, with the cast on crooked
Off like a khufi, the figure's a big doofy
He tried to get schoolie, with that tool for you
One two for me G, cut the cranky attitude
Wet 'em like a handkerchief, or a stanky fatter dude
Whether you'se a rapper or a damn singer
Once you in there's only one way out, like a gang banger
With a new crew key chain, and street name
What set do he claim for fame, game
Just to keep feather and stay dipped
You need it like a letter, or better a get away whip
This old thing's rusted and crusted as the bowl
Rings the all kings busted
Planning in, global starvation and fat herb
Now what in tarnation did I go and do that for?
Stuff happens, like getting snuffed for tough tit rappings
See I told him enough, quit your yapping
The same apply to any and all chumps
The only question he had for y'all was how many lumps
Three or four, either or
Mon cheri amore, so why you need your heater for?
The super villain slid in your party for free
Want an MC, get out of here, kid, you bother me

[Ghostface Killah]
The day I took my mask off
My face was missing for two days
For the record, G, came back a year later
A whole new identity, Toney Starks pedigree
My money green like my nickname was celery
Who is Ghost? He flashed his toast
Never wore sheets, but bulletproof coats
Oh no! The feds cried for the mask back on
Told them Ghost is dead, he'll return at the crack of dawn
Few years from now, him and his pals
Before the Jetson era will rock, he'll be back summer time 2005
With a half of face iron, the other half water, look like alien science
In the summer time, you can see the face boil
But the other side, I keep luke with the Pennzoil
Mad loyal, when the winter time come, I gets stuck with my brain all numb
Like I ate thousand icey's and frozen Pepsi's
Aquaman's pops can't water check me, disrespect me, indirectly
I seen his feet and they both lefty, he steppin' half correctly
As I stroll the globe and terrorize the planet
With a Bill Clinton mask and them Playskool hens
Me and Doom, always be the best on the landing
Superheroes for life until our souls vanish

[Outro: Brak from Space Ghost]
Check me out my name is Brak and not to fuck
I got a mom and a dad and they all outback
We're sitting by the pool, and we never on snacks
And we eat a big lunch and we all take naps
Why the beat stop? Hey! Hey!
I got a Mask too, so give me a mic! (You're no Doom!)
Come on Danger Mouse, give me that beat!
Turn the beat around, love to hear precaution
(You suck) Turn it upside down!
Love to hear the... (I'm know talent, and you ain't got it)
I wasn't done!

[MF Doom]
Perfect hair, to the second power of forever
Ask him do he need it? Hells yeah, now or never
On a mission with friends of fair weather
Sooner the better, off to Mt. Tuna, wear your leather prepared sweater
And watch out for Catman my brothers
He keep his strand slicked back like Scatman Caruthers
A balding boy, sound like Janeane Garofalo
Fiend for a sloppy fro, who seen the evil Coiffio?
Not me yo, I'm leavin, I'm gone
Even if him got them bomb weavin Kalikelon
No more or less stress than your old boss
The tears burn your eyes less than fresh S-curls sores
And Brenda, the best girl lost
Uncle grandfather bare chest was pearl gloss
Earl tossed, there goes a whole tray of hamburgers
Villain 'til they old and grey like olden day scamworkers
Circa one nine seventy-one
On the mic machine it seems his work will never be done
He seeks the ninth level of power
But weak geek might freak it in another hour
or so, they call the fool retarded hair guy
In school you could spot it when he nodded "Here, why?"
I think his true name was Gerald
The toupee, the male pattern anime herald
A good laugh like the walk to the bank
not the plank, talk to the hand and the hot frank dog

(*BEEP!!*}

[Master Shake]
Danger Doom it's Master Shake, hey buddy!
Ah did you get those e-mails I sent?
Umm, I'm still waitin, to hear from you
I-I think, maybe you're, maybe you're in the shower
Do you, are you in the shower? Okay
But I'm still, totally, I got some other stuff
Uhh, but I'm, I am committed more to doing yours
So, if you can let me know, today
That'd, uhh, that'll be great, okay?!
Just, just gimme a call! And fa-for the schnizzle
For to do the rap pizzle
And again I'm really sorry, about that other one
The call... Meatwad sucks
Okay, call me back dog!

{*phone hangs up*}

(feat. Cee-Lo)


[Chorus: Cee-Lo]
His name's, Doom
They wonder just who is he
But don't wor..ry,
Believe me he'll get busy
When it comes, to
poetry he's got plenty
La la lahhhhhh... la la la la lah

[MF Doom]
Jump 'em in like jump rope, double dutch
Then turn on the mic with a thumb stroke, subtle touch
Cuddle clutch, is this thing on?
Like the fling with Mrs. King Kong, this spring gone?
Sing a song of slaphappy crappiness
He came to blow like it was strapped to his nappy chest
Surely I jest, the best on a wireless mic
Not an eye test, yet I di-gress
But why stress? Try and remember when
Maybe bit the tender skin-ned babysitter Gwendolyn
The type to hit and run and go tell a friend
Word to El Muerto cucaracha exoskeleton
He know, flow like interstellar wind
Tow a rap djinn by his toe into hell again
{*ahem*} One two, check me too
Loose wreck see through your gooseneck EQ

[Chorus]

[MF Doom]
Aiy! If I may interject
Rap these days is like a pain up in the neck
Cornier and phonier than a play fight
Take two of these and don't phone me on the late night
... the beat won't fail me
With more rhymes than times he washed his hands and feet daily
And all that kerosene ain't cheap
Villain been deep since a teenage creep
Peep - he always was a gentleman
And kept the pen and a pencil in his mental den
Right there next to where the Rolodex was
Before it turned up all burnt by his solar plexus
He don't know his own strength
When he's on the bone it's like the microphone's length
and width, ain't it funky like dingy socks?
Feel the full effect off cassette in your Benzie Box

[Chorus]

(feat. Talib Kweli)


[Talib Kweli]
One two three, in the place to be!
MF Doom, Talib Kweli, ah here we go
On born days, I used to blow out the candles; and every Saturday
watch cartoons 'til noon and then I'd switch to Ralph McDaniels
I was, makin up a miracle flow, over a cereal bowl
And a paused beat from my stereo
Rhymes stronger than Popeye with the spinach
Yeah I'm gangster like the frog on Courageous Cat and Minute Mouse
Maybe I'm trippin and it's just a cartoon to you
But I got chills when I heard how Doom flipped the Scooby Doo
And, I might be buggin but it seem to me
that cartoons be realer than reality TV
They inspire my decision to be open and listen
But folks got it all twisted, like a yoga position
Like, in order to spit it dope, you gotta have a criminal past
that's similar to the cast of Different Strokes
Me and my people break bread, sit and smoke
The conversation rich, but that depend on what you consider broke
I draw on anything for inspiration
A fond memory, a piece of paper, walls in a train station

[Chorus: Talib Kweli]
It's just that I'm old school like that, roll that rap over soul loops like that
It's just that I'm old school like that, roll that rap over soul loops like that
(I'm old school y'all, yes y'all, I keep it goin y'all, here we go)
It's just that I'm old school like that, roll that rap over soul loops like that
(I'm old school y'all, keep it goin y'all, keep it goin y'all)
It's just that I'm old school like that, roll that rap over soul loops like that
(Ah here we go, c'mon)

[MF Doom]
And we'll be right back after these messages
Fellas grab your nutsacs, chicks squeeze your breastesses
We ain't all that grown, it's still funny like
Goin to the store on your own with rainbow money
Since then had an insane flow sonny
Walkin to the corner rhymin in the rain, nose runny
Breakdancin maybe ten, bummy
is when Subroc would run up handspring Arabian somee!
Ooh wee, like a Hong Kong Phooey kick
Or a weekend afternoon, karate movie flick
Slept good, no justice, no peace
Woody kept it hoody, never discussed it with police
Shot the fair one nobody ran to get the gat
Or felt they had to put it up in they raps to set it fat
And since when lyrical skills had to do with killin a cat?
What type of chitlins is that?
The Super Villain as the bat, hide your tonic
Whoever willin to ride, provide raw chronic

[Chorus]

[Talib] Yeah!

(feat. Danger Mouse and MF Doom)


[Meatwad]
Danger Doom in the hizzy!
Widdy widdy widdy widdy widdy widdy widdy we
We need food

[Carl]
Whare you doin there?

[Meatwad]
I'm rappin

[Carl]
Yeah... no, no I see that - what for?

[Meatwad]
Money - if you got it umm
I wanna get some steady bitches and hoes
And some candy for my nose
Some diamond stones, to roll with my chrome and..

[Carl]
Hey, genius. You even know what that means?

[Meatwad]
Uh-uh - what does it mean?

[Carl]
Where's the keyboards, and the tambourine, and the guitar
And you know, I mean - the stuff that like, white people like

[Meatwad]
We had a piano

[Carl]
Somethin bad-ass, like uhh, I don't know
Like uhh, REO Speedwagon or somethin

[Meatwad]
Hell yeah!

[MF Doom]
Aiyyo, I know this dude right
Carl, he wore tight blue sweats but wasn't glued too tight
All he had upstairs was a crude light
You think that's weird? He lived next door to a food fight
Howdy Danger, much obliged for the beat God
Even though you still eat lard, by the Meatwad
Mesquite charred, speakin of which or who
Voice all squeaky like they tuned it up a pitch or two
A cuhnk of burned up witch's brew, get your crew
See if they can't get pat the stench of the stew
It stank like a septic tank full of big poo
He mostly only turned into a frank or a igloo
Switch your view to the brother with the fried dreads
Not to be confused with the incense selling thai heads
His name rhymes with Mike-Cock
You could call him livewire, eye sockets, Frylock
Able to shoot electricity through his eyeballs
And blast all through your single sided brick and drywall
More interesting than professional wrestling
When he's online, you can find him on Instant Pestering
What's up with your boy? He's not a soft or hot drink
Whoever don't like it could suck his straw, it's hot pink
On some junk like Gucci on a classy ho
Might splash you in the face with nuclear pistachio
Make a fast break, or that'll be the last mistake
that ass'll make is what you get for messin with Master Shake
Look out, don't block the screen son, lunge across
Tryin to watch [Adult Swim], "Aqua Teen Hunger Force!"
Rock this cult hymn, sock your mean younger boss
Psht - [Adult Swim], "Aqua Teen Hunger Force!"
He often wondered, should he get the logo tatted to his woody?
He could be "#1 in the hood, G!"
Easily

(*BEEP!!*}

[Master Shake]
Shake callin, he heh
You know I wa-ahhhhhhaaaaeehh
I'd just got off the phone with somebody else and uh
that wasn't about you
That was about me being upset about something else
I shouldn't have called you but I did, cause I just
I like you so much, I'm REALLY looking forward to us working together
And just, as of now that I'm calm
And after I've apologized profusely - probably too much
I am available, call me doggie - woof!

{*phone hangs up*}

[Harvey Birdman]
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, we all lived through the 70's
The clothes, the music, the heartwarming but rarely amusing Ziggy cartoons
Now, later, who are we to look at these two, fine young men
and say, "You there - I sit in judgment of you!"

[MF Doom]
For being a drunken lush, and bad as hell
Read the charge and thunk, sunk in in a plush padded cell
Temperpedic Craftmatic adjustable
Go on try to stare at it, it's not that combustible
I accidentally split some kerosene
And dozed off with the L lit, doped up on thorazine
Matter of fact, make mines a double
Few could see the point like a line through the Hubble
Doom hit the eye in the sky with a pie
Shrink said he thinks he believe he could fly
Spread his wings and flap like a goose
He'll show you how to do it if you help him get the straps loose
Diagnosed as shell shocked from totin toast
And still could hear the bells rock Doc, another loading dose
He claimed he couldn't take the racket
Faked his own escape in a eightball straight jacket

[Myron Reducto]
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury
This, animal, here; this ursine fellow
UNCLEAN!
He rejected society and retreated
to a cave in the woods to plot his vile - NOD!

[unknown quote]
And it isn't true that at these times
he often descends into a delusional state
Sometimes actually adopting another person's persona?

[MF Doom]
I started punchin once I saw son lungin
He had me put on punishment for eating the last Munchkin
So now they got me down here near the dungeon
Nurses all arguin' over who's to do the spongin
He requested time off for bugged behavior
And rhymed off of thug beats bumped by a neighbor
Who spoke with his fist and kept a mirror with a thumbhole
Cell twelve drumroll, ode to a gum sole
A O.G. like a captain that's retired
Rappers is space cadets yappin – be quiet
And that's an order - ship your daughters to my quarters at once
And don't sip the tap water dunce
He is the super, a stranger who talks to you
Maybe even offer tech support and walk you through
Villain, man in the mask, spit in the face
Show him where to go, inside a hand basket case

[Myron Reducto]
The defendant's confession!

[Harvey Birdman]
Uhh, nothing further

[Mentok the Mindtaker]
Mentok commands you to procede, with your case!

[MF Doom]
Just since some people, wear a mask
Don't mean.. they.. did nothing automatically

[Harvey Birdman]
Now wait a second!
Your Honor I'd respectfully like to have a word with you in chambers

[MF Doom]
I request an immediate dismissal, on the grounds...
On grounds that... {*laughter is heard*}

[Harvey Birdman]
Your honor I...

[MF Doom]
Just as the mask, some people wear a mask
Don't mean that they did something {*more laughter*}

[Marco]
Well, Debbie thinks this is all about her biological clock
And I...

[Stormy]
She stopped screaming long enough to tell you that?

[Marco]
Huh? No no no no, no, the other Debbie
Debbie the teacher?

[Stormy]
Oh, you mean... {*whispering*} Black Debbie

[Sparks]
Whoa whoa whoa whoa, why is she "Black" Debbie?

[Stormy]
No, not in a BAAAD way
It's just to tell them apart because she's... black!

[MF Doom]
True, Doom rolled on through with a whole crew
That stole on you for holding old brew, who told you?
Even if it's crap, mind your own business
They raps ain't got no gift like a lonely Christmas
Real phony with beats that's hardly fresh
How they manage to deal is anybody's guess
Yours is as good as mine, she's sure fine
From the hood where you squeeze your nine off the free cheese line
All you saw was a {*edit*} do a bee's line
to where she stood and sipped the Nehi Grape, the sweet kind
Circle you, thicker by de-sign
Be-hind swingin like bring it back, come rewind
Uhh, excuse me boo
She stuck out her tongue, it was purple number two
FDA approved played it smoother than a doo rag
What a brother gotta do to get a taste a some of you?
Bagged, and he don't mean coach
Then she saw the mask, acted like she seen a roach
The mirror shine reflect colors like your CD's
Show love to others, we all brothers like the Bee Gees
All except the broads and you
Hold your applause, they break God's laws and who pays?
The taxpayer that's who
Catch a rapper by his toe and smack off his tattoos
That's gonna leave a bruise
Leave 'em grievin blues like believin in evening news
They must be eatin glue
Heave it all back, and we even Steven Sue
Sprinkle lyrics like seasoning beef stew
and sneezin all in it after breathin in the flu
Get a clue, his reasoning is askew
As to all the feverin and heavin up goo
Either that or... dude
Leave your girl around this man whore and she's too screwed
Just in case she's in a "what you wanna do" mood
Bring your plate to the Metal Face and get your food chewed
... tastes like chicken
He wastes no time like the bassline kickin in
Or like a lace eye with you through thick and thin
Raw humor, face pie to a frickin chin
New York'n, a hell of a finer town
Choose your words wisely from the Boogie Down to Chinatown
Or be found with a hole in your designer gown
In the role of public opinion it earned a minor frown
If you think you're slick, you might could wish, but uhh
As a few good men set sights to link with your chick
You have to find a new hen fight to drink your liq'
Ten years later, see how Enzyte'll shrink your... wallet
As you wallow in a sorrow pit
Cheers, is that your beer kid? Then swallow it
or get chased by the Sandman, on some Apollo {shit}
Flow so weird, his own peers couldn't follow it
On the phone, he sounded like a real paid {"whoa whoa whoa"}
Then we met in person, he was three shades blacker
That's why he saved money over ball and chain dames
We all the same, no callin names

[Stormy]
I'm as smart as him!

[Quinn]
What? I got Ph.D's in four scientific disciplines

[Stormy]
Really?

[Quinn]
Why do you think they call me Dr. Quinn?

[Stormy]
Um, I just thought that was a nickname
You know, like Dr. Dre
East-siiiiiiiide!

[MF Doom]
The fat is in the fire, a fryer made of chicken wire
Gettin sick and tired of a friggin liar
Pelican, with some very soft mangoes
A closet full of skeletons and terry cloth Kangols
Flew the coop, before you hit it let me warn you
She did a cool hula-hoop, but don't get any on you
It's all a big scam, to make y'all eat pig ham
When he's on the mic he's like the triggerman, fig jam
Doom, not to be confused with nobody
Especially, since the flows he used was so nutty
Never too woozy to go study, crews got no clues
Like old cruddy Officer McGillicuddy
Watch your six, he got a lot of more tricks
, bricks, on sticks sure got raw-nytics
It's a gift, don't get shot for kicks
With the same slick used to plot sick vicks with
Spotted at a chick flick, holdin hands
The other one on his swollen glands, a golden chance
That's why he kept them holes in his pants
Rollin in a old van, is what he told his stolen fans
Is that you true? Matched from hat to shoe
Snafu, snatch any brew, LaBatt's Blue
Black jew like that's new, patch me through
No latch attached, skat shoo, catch twenty-two
Super, he's loaded dice nice
And overpriced, a arm and a leg; homey life or your ice
Villain, nag a grieving old hag
Snag a bragger by his mic cord and leave him holding the bag
Come clean, a bunch of dumb mean cream puffs
A keen drum machine buff, who fiends for more green stuff
Instead of starvin there be problems by the goo gobs
Aight - somebody's robbin Lou Dobbs and them tonight
And he's on the next flight, moon bound
And makes it a point to stay away from the goon pound
Got some peers, that's gone in the lost years
Tears and cheers, born in the crosshairs

{*Thundercleese sings*}

[Brak]
Hey Mr. Thundercleese!
What's that you were singing?

[Thundercleese]
It is the Robotic Hymn of Doom

[Brak]
Well I always say
Nuttin livens up a Robotic Hymn of Doom
better than AN AMAZING PAIR OF JUGS!

[MF Doom]
The Villain ain't rhymin off cred alone
Let him get some cognac, a mic and a headphone
Smoke the mirrors, caught her in the mix
Couldn't read the shorthand for mortars and bricks
If any negative thought linger he let it vent
Wrote this one with his middle finger in wet cement
... Did it on the sly
Before he's gone bye bye spit it on the fly
Brush your teeth, rinse and gargle
A true nerd who messed with new words since Boggle
... And used slang in Scrabble
Rhymed with a Northern drawl, twang and babble
Flossy pen jargon to break the world record
Do a Faustian bargain and tape the girl naked
... More spots than a leopard
Then he had to stop, the block was hot peppered
Shepherd, leading the sheeps out to slaughter
Kept your soul and repped it, everytime he saw ya
Tryin to douse a pinch of weed in a frat street house

[Cartoon] (MF Doom)
I'll make mince meat out of that (beat) mouse!

[MF Doom]
Welcome to the show
Remember whatever you do, do not boo the flow
Schooled the dumb on the number one rule of thumb
What a fool; still you never met a cooler bum
Give the drummer some rum, I'm sure he could use a shot
Just to get his cues hot, ensure he don't lose his spot
A stranger who speaks to you vocal
Danger made the beat get a freak to do the bogle
No bull, everything he wanted they grabbed and took
Whole lab looked like an ill left jab and hook
Even had a secretary to take the calls
Shake it and make it fall, I told her don't break my balls
Wherever Mouse go, trouble follows
The bounty on this pro was mills and "double dollars"
Vil's spills muddled flows that befuddle scholars
Thick Buffalo girl with the bubble hollars
She rocked leather and gold, a fat blouse
And need a brother with soul to let her cat out
Even if the rat couldn't compete with Kraus

[Cartoon] (MF Doom)
I'll make mince meat out of that (beat) mouse!

[MF Doom]
Tap ya toe, grime and strapped for dough
Rap for show, to let the whippersnappers know
Sucks to be them, now pass that loot
Up under the tux he wore a hazmat suit
Sounded like froggy, sip the groggiest of potions
Be up in the party with the foggiest of notions
On the list of lobbyists who save the oceans
Gave his donation to the lady with the lotions
Swoll hand itchin, the old man bitchin
Switchin with the fan with the gold band twitchin
Spittin like a bionic sneeze that freeze vodka
Just to clear the air like the Ionic Breeze Quadra
Sleek enough to outsly a fox
for a chicken pot pie, thinkin outside the box
... Enough to taste her goody
But got no time to be wastin chasin putty
Out for Daffy Duck bucks, Porky Pig paper
Bugs Bunny money or Sylvester Cat caper
Offer DAT tape of rap, country or deep house
And

[Cartoon] (MF Doom)
I'll make mince meat out of that (beat) mouse!

(feat. Danger Mouse and MF Doom)


[Ignignokt] Behold y'all, the digital vats of urine
[Err] Drink up bitches! Taste our liquid gold
[Ignignokt] Err, you must respect yourself
[Ignignokt] Forst you wreck yourself
[Err] Hey man, you made a rhyme!
[Ignignokt] Yes it is for I am a rap God, from beyond the moon

[MF Doom]
Everybody talkin 'bout pistols, gats is borin
He came with a new topic to flip you, vats of urine
All pro, check the stats, his style scorin
While you at it, double check that Cristal you're pourin
Born of the pleads that needs a P in geniuses
Broads don't see it, since they don't got these, conveniences
Thank God she's not a ho
In the studio when you gotta go, you gotta go
Before you flow, make sure you practice or you losin
You don't wanna miss and let the cactus get to oozin
If any contestant splash, he's disqualified
Even if one drip should slide down the bottle side
Put a bum in a even better pickle
Reality show, how far would you go, to get a nickel?
... let alone a buck
Listen by the window, you can hear him moanin - yuck!
Remember, tomorrow is garbage day
It's not the kind of stuff you want to save and harbor away
Once it gets ripened and fermented
It takes on a bouquet that I should say is naturally scented
Tempted by a empty can of Guinness
Or waitin until we get there, say two or three minutes
Yeah, when it's fresh, it's sterile
Some say digestible, even edible
If you was stranded out to sea, alone and in trouble
Survive dehyrdation, guzzle your own cup full
Some day, you may even show your son how
to use it to make potassium nitrate for gunpowder
Funded by friends of ours who's generous
Join us next time when we discuss disgusting enemas

[Err] He's like a rap God
[Err] He's like a big log, that you find in your toilet
[Ignignokt] Fo' real!
[Err] Bow down and suck his knees!
[Ignignokt] And I am about to kick it all up in here
[Err] Stand by for kicking!
[Ignignokt] I am the kicker Err, not you
[Ignignokt] You kick elsewhere
[Err] This sucks man, I'm bored
[Ignignokt] Me too!

[Space Ghost]
I don't believe this!
I get rid of those two evil maniacs who try to ruin my show
And I get two evil GUESTS who are trying to ruin my show

[Zorak]
FEH!
Just who came up with the stupid idea
of giving Space Ghost a talk show in the first place?

[MF Doom]
How they gave his own show to Tad Ghostal
Any given second he could go mad postal
Stay wavin that power band space cannon
And have the nerve to jump in the face, of Race Bannon
Punked out; luckily he deaded it
And guess who's the schmuck whose credited with editing it?
Your man Moltar, the cop out
Ain't have no other career choice, he dropped out
Since when the Way-Outs included Zorak
Way back he used to rub his thorax in Borax
{*Zorak laughs*} I'm not the one that sold him to it
If he won't admit it, I'm not gonna hold him to it
It's all love and no hate though
For all that, the Villain need to get his own late show
Do a monologue and jest with the guests
Madlib, switch the beat and walk him to the desk
With Danger holding down the control room
Late again returning from commercial - I told you Doom!
Early, he's on B.P.T.
Catch him on public access free TV
And we're back, live on the air with Brak {"Hey!"}
So Brak, how your man got a show that's so whack? {"What?"}
Have you ever thought to work with Err and Ignignokt an' them?
{*Err laughs*} And do you got enough oxygen from this toxic phlegm?
Another sec', his neck woulda got flames
Mouse switched the screen to some hot dames
Tonight's audience will receive miscreant video games
And fifteen seconds of fame - pitiful lames!
It's just a shame; I'm zonin
Competin for the same prime time slot as Conan
No dummy, Ichigawa
Announcement free lunch to any stunt who lets me plow her
in the shower for an hour, the kids 'sposed to be asleep
Or else to join it sound like Road Runner - BEEP BEEP!
Later this week - Big Ben Klingon
After him there's no one else we could afford to bring on
... Keep it ghetto
And let 'em know, B.Y.O.B. from the get go
[*ahem*] I'd like to propose a toast
To the grossest host, Space Ho's Coast to Coast
That destructo ray's a played out gag
And the cape and the pants suit, lookin like a straight out...
Dag! Don't mean to sound crunchy
Hit a honey from the back and crumpled up her scrunchie
A light snack, hungry munchie
Felt a funny hunch that she told him donkey punch me
Tomorrow it's Father Guido Sarducci
Father MC, and Charo "Coochie Coochie"
With her new best seller, "Who You Call a Hoochie?"
A proud sponsor of the snoochie boochie noochies
Look Leela eyeball to eyeballs
And find out how to get inside them sugar pie walls
Our next guest a real cutey specimen
And she's startin to get a little booty, Miss Judy Jetson
So Judy; boxers, briefs or fig leaf?
As you know I wear my boxers so my big...
Cue the rapper tell him bring what little he got
Up against the Villy, it's really not diddly-squat
Until they head hurts - when it come to wreck
Crews is like them dudes in red shirts off Star Trek
He Kirk, he Spock, he McCoy
Been b-boy, since you jerks first squeezed toys
Born to be the host with the most
When it's on it's on, Space Ho's Coast to Coast

[Space Ghost]
You think I'm just gonna hand over my show to you Doom?
Have you lost your {fucking} mind?
Listen; I'm not gonna hand my show over to you
You know why? Because, it's my show
Mine, not yours - Space Ghost
It ain't "Doom Coast to Coast"
Yeah, yeah sure, here are the keys to the show
Why don't you drive for a while?
Yeah America's cravin some Doom, here you go

[MF Doom]
Not a lot of bling
When he do the thing, bada boom, bada bing
From the womb to the tomb
Get that ricotta, bada bing, bada boom
Doom, your reputation precedes you
Wail 'til you crack and see what "weed" do, you dweeb you
No pun intended, takes one to know one, will know - it's unscented
Yo son, demented when them sent it from the other time
Before everybody and they mother rhyme
What a crime - beats is the same way
Make 'em wanna hit the streets with the heat for a lame's pay
Game day, flag on the play, improper helmet
Drag on the suede from the gem drop of well spit
He didn't listen, titty kissin the city glistened
Depending on what from what position you're sittin
In the pissy wind, is this thing whistlin?
Who let the spinnin whisperin djinn in?
The Villain again? Without a doubt
That's his name, don't play it out
Or spray it, when you say it out your mouth
Then gave him a cold shoulder for a hour
And told him take a gold shower, for fakin funk, soul power
... stocky, short and cocky
Looked like Apollo Creed after he fought with Rocky
Rhymed in a broken english slang, not cockney
Thirteen, his first queen wore hot knock knees
Had to tell her pops, yo stop cockblockin B
Hold somethin for your daily yay habit
Then go, bada-bing-bing-bing like ricochet rabbit
How 'bout the sicko say stab it?
There's liquor in the cabinet and a slicker for the crafted
And Heineken, I told him much obliged friend
What I gotta spend, if I only touch her thighs then?
... why his eyes widened
He didn't know your man had a nice surprise hidin
Took pride in ridin in a sly wiseguy grin
... real recognize real
On the microphone, the wheels are mechanized steel
Please, at least respect your ideals
How you got her walkin along the stroll in high heels?
He said her mamma was gettin old
God bless her poor soul, now no more drama is your role
Straight to the head
He know a lot of haters can't wait 'til he dead
Lead to go, like a ho, to a strange whack housewife
Only thing he know will change his back do', how trife
Rules is rules, don't go there
Stay on sale like a old coat made of mohair
Keep a snotty chicken on E, the Lone Ranger
Why everybody always pickin on Danger?
... and Doom, maybe it's him
Called up my lady, told her baby it's slim
Make me up a margarita I need to take a swim
Tell them kids remember school - if they let 'em out, cool
But get the hell from out the pool

(*BEEP!!*}

[Master Shake]
Hey {shithead}, it's me again!
And you know what? I just heard, IT'S ALL DONE NOW!
And somehow, I guess you must have lost my number
You know what?! YOU SUCK!
YOU SUCK! YOUR MUSIC SUCKS!
AND I HATE YOUR SUCKY STUPID METAL FACE!
I hope you BURN, you're going DOWN
This is the last big mistake, you'll ever make
YOU SUCK!!! I HATE YOUR GUTS!
...
But, if there is another project in the future please keep me in mind
Thank you

{*phone hangs up*}

[Meatwad]
Beef rap, could lead to gettin teeth capped
Or even a wreath, for Mom Dukes on so-some grief crap
I suggest you change your diet
It could lead to high blood pressure, if you fry it
Or even a stroke, heart attack, heart disease
It ain't no startin back once arteries starts to squeeze
Take a easy way out phony, until then
They know they wouldn't be takin that bologna in the bullpen
So disgustin, pardon self as I discuss this
They talk a wealth of {shit} and that they ain't never seen the justice
Wait that was off the beat - BUST THIS
Like a cool milk from out the toilet
Two batteries, some Brillo and some foil, he'll boil it
He be better off on PC glued
And it's a feud, so don't be in no TV mood
Each week, it's mystery meat - seaweed stewed
Food - we need food
Cause I can't, stop that pimpin any more
I forgot out where I started, pimpin fool

[Carl]
There you go, yeah! That's good